Are You Resolved?
New Year’s Eve. It’s a time when many of us are thinking about Resolutions. Ways to better ourselves. To change. To evolve.
Decide firmly on a course of action.
How are your resolutions shaping up? If you are like a lot of people, they might look something like these:
Go to the gym 3 times a week. Cut out sugar. Eat more vegetables. Run a half-marathon. No more fried foods. Lose 10 (or 20 or 30) pounds. Do a 21-day cleanse. Get back on track. Fix myself.
Do. Something. Different.
Because what I’ve been doing isn’t working.
Now don’t get me wrong. I think New Year’s is a great time for a fresh start. For re-evaluating what’s working and what isn’t. For renewal. For taking stock. For making new choices. For discarding the old and embracing the new.
What I don’t think it’s time for is coming up with a big long list of “shoulds”. So let’s take a closer look at that list of resolutions, goals, and intentions. How do they make you feel? What would it require for you to follow through on them? Are you looking forward to doing them?
Or will they require willpower? Is there a feeling of dread? A churning in the pit of your stomach? A voice in your head reminding you how many times you’ve failed at them?
Remember, the reason you want to start over is because what you’ve been doing isn’t working. So if you are re-hashing old resolutions because you think they are what you should be doing, maybe it’s time to re-think them.
I firmly believe that any goal or resolution or plan that has its roots in willpower, deprivation, should, dread, fear, force, stress, unease, or any other negative feeling is doomed to fail. And with its failure comes self-deprecation, self-loathing, self-recrimination, self-hatred, self-blame, shame, guilt, stress, and a whole host of negative feelings that do nothing for that healthy glow you were after when you started.
So what’s a strong, amazing, gorgeous, empowered woman who wants to better herself supposed to do with that? What if you still want to set some goals, intentions, or resolutions? What if you still want to eat better, exercise more, shed some weight? Are you wrong for wanting that? Heck, no!
I just want you to want it because it you love it, because you love you! I want you to make choices that light you up, that make you feel good, that bring you feelings of joy, bliss, longing, excitement, inspiration!
Eat beautiful, nourishing foods that bring you pleasure and eat them slowly, savoring each bite, truly tasting and experiencing your meals. Bring the love and joy into preparing your food, love for yourself and your body, trust your body’s wisdom to know what it needs, what it truly craves.
Move in ways that light you up – do you ache for community and need a hiking group, Zumba class or yoga studio to get you going – or are you yearning the solitude of an early morning walk or languid stretching in peace to keep you together? Tap into what your heart is telling you.
When you create resolutions that match your desires, your wants, your wishes, your needs, what your mind, body, soul and heart are craving, you crowd out the shoulds and willpower and force and failure. You lean into your own wisdom and intuition and create the life you truly want.