I binged my way through nutrition school.
When I decided to go back to school and study nutrition, I thought I had it all figured out. I had been within 5-10 pounds of my “goal weight” for almost 3 years. I wore a size 6. And my plan was to teach other women how to do what I did.
You see, all you had to do in order to lose weight and keep it off was to count every calorie. Plan every bite. Calculate the ratio of fats, carbs and protein. Stay away from “trigger foods” like cookies and ice cream. And never, ever cheat.
In other words, be on a permanent diet.
I’d been living that way for over 4 years. And I’d reached that magic number. The Holy Grail. My Goal Weight. The one that I had wanted to weigh my entire adult life, but never thought I would.
The day I started my last diet I was working full time. My eating was completely haphazard and out of control. And one morning when I went to get dressed, it happened.
None of my pants fit anymore.
I was in a panic. I literally thought “What am I gonna do? Call in FAT?!”
I managed to find a very stretched out pair of jeans in the hamper, squeezed into them, and cried on my way to the office. The first thing I did that morning was sign up for a popular diet website, thinking I just wanted to be told what to eat.
Over the next 15 months I counted and dieted and willed my way to my goal. And for the next few years, I kept counting and dieting and willing myself to stay there.
Until, a few months into nutrition school, I learned that planning and counting and willing and struggling and fighting each day was actually a form of disordered eating.
Suddenly the earth shifted under my feet. My controlling ways weren’t the answer. I didn’t have it all figured out. I wasn’t meant to teach other women how to be on a permanent diet, how to be in permanent struggle.
It was time for me to learn how “normal people” ate.
Geneen Roth, author of Women Food and God says that for every diet there is an equal and opposite binge. And boy did that ring true for me after 4+ years of restrictive eating.
So I studied Eating Psychology. I learned Intuitive Eating. I was my own guinea pig. And eventually, I found balance. I found peace with food. I found myself forgetting that there was leftover Halloween candy in the cupboard.
When I stopped obsessing over the numbers and I stopped restricting my food, the rebellious eating went away because there were no rules to rebel against.
And I know that I will never go on another weight loss diet!
I also know that I am more comfortable and natural in my body now than I was back when I wore a size 6.
I have a freedom around food that I never thought was possible for me.
And I have so much appreciation for my body, for my shape, for what I’m capable of. No number on the scale ever gave me that.
So now I help 40-something women like you, who are ready to get off the diet-binge roller coaster for good, reach your natural weight – without dieting. A weight that is effortless to maintain, one that lets you feel good about your body.
No more bingeing or emotional eating. No more punishing yourself with diets. No more guilt for going off of them. All while being completely at ease and comfortable in your own skin – because isn’t that what the real goal is?
I’m on a mission to help create a world in which women of all shapes and sizes love themselves and their bodies, and where food is just easy.